22/12/2023

As Advent draws to an end the Church never loses sight of the other babies who have also been announced to their Mothers by God's messenger. All of them have gone on to do great things in the Providence of God and their deeds have been become History recorded in the Scriptures. As a child I fantasised about Samuel's call from God which awakened him when he was sleeping.

The life of a Prophet was not to be for me. I have lived my life,however, aware that my sins can always be forgiven and/but have still tried and failed to avoid them. I have not always been able to resist the undoubted pleasure that can be found through sex but, I hope sincerely, have repented for the sins of my youth. Great personal misery has often resulted in my life as result of my sinful behaviour and I am ashamed that it is this avoidance of misery that is stronger than the knowing, loving and serving that should be my holiness in God's Providence.

In moments of remorse I have been annoyed that some people have been chosen to live sinless lives. If Our Lady was born without sin, why couldn't I have been? Why has God given me this misery? Did I ask to be born?. Today I know that those questions were a search for excuses in sin and that my undoubted guilt is wiped out by my choosing to follow the Will of God. That is why he chose Calvary.

I know that I am living outside of the Institutional Church founded on St Peter but also know that that Institution has always been too much in this world to be able to guide us to "My Kingdom is not of this World." I am sure that there are and have been many souls such as mine who put all our Faith in Father, Son and Holy Spirit, in Jesus whose Divine Holiness was, for most of his life, known in person only to Mary and Joseph.

We are all known in person to "Our Father" and have been given this chance to seek in this world the love/holiness that is the very being of Our Creator. It is our free choosing of what is good that will bring us to life everlasting in the Kingdom of God. Thanks be to God.

Dear Lord, let my heart be open to your grace, let my soul welcome you into my being, joyfully as did Mary. Let my deeds today be pleasing to you. Let me have the "holy fear" that was Samuel's first reaction to your call. May all of my family find in me something that reflects your merciful forgiveness and not be swamped by the worldliness that rules our lives at this the time of your Nativity. May my prayers be heard and joined with those of all the faithful, with Mary's and all the Saints that all the billions of us living and dead be cleansed of our sins and accept the righteousness of your judgement.