I must try to approach the Lord with true emptying of self; and yet it is myself that wants to to d the approaching."iI" want to pray as a soul before his master. The typo at the beginning of the last sentence shows my mind. My little "i" cannot get on with being true to the belief that sometimes fills my being for the the big "I" is always there in the background wondering whether what I write would appear sincere to a reader.

Lord let my soul sincerely belong to you and let me "Bless you Unawares". Let me be always aware of the cross on which you cried out in despair this day 2000 years ago. 

John's account of the events of Good Friday is surely the account of an eyewitness but without the profound emotion of that day; the despair felt by all the disciples; the utter shame of Peter ; the desperation of Judas unable to change the course of his actions. And what about Mary who watches her only son bleed to death; is this the Father's business that he must be about? What can she make of his words to John.? All of these were there in this time  but John writes his account after the being of the world has become totally changed by the Lord's resurrection The world is totally changed by God's resurrection as Son with Holy Spirit to guide and support us through our lives. This is what we must find in the corruption  that is Church.

 This day is the day of death for God whose love knew no limit to bring salvation to us all. Dear Lord, Let me not refuse this love by forgetting my place within your loving mercy.